This woman has willingly giving us permission to share her story so that others can realize there is hope in the midst of a difficult situation. All client experiences with Advice & Aid Pregnancy Centers are kept with the highest confidence. The stories that are shared come from the real-life experiences that our clients, staff and volunteers had during their unplanned pregnancy.
Her name has been removed but her story is true.
Feelings of inadequacy
I was a reluctant first-time mother to say the least. I had always thought I wouldn’t have any children. However, one month that dreaded question arose – could I be pregnant? The test came back negative, but I detected disappointment in my husband’s eyes. Maybe he wasn’t all in with my decision not to have kids after all. It was time to reassess.
Two years later baby girl #1 arrived. Three years after that we welcomed baby girl #2. The problem: I had absolutely no confidence in my abilities as a mother. I had never felt that strong urge to have babies. I was a thinker, not a feeler. My relational skills were less than stellar. I loved my work, but was convicted that I should be at home to raise my girls. My world had been ROCKED!
Lessons learned
Baby girl #1 is now 27, married, an MBA student and future President (I don’t yet know whether that will be corporate or our nation). Baby girl #2 is 24, engaged, working on her masters degree in counseling, and loves people who are hurting. Do I sound like a proud mama? That’s because I am! I love my girls, their guys, and being a part of our growing family.
I love this life that I never thought I wanted.
And I’ve learned a few things along the way.
* I couldn’t do it by myself.
I needed my husband, my mother, friends, and family to give me the encouragement and confidence that I needed. Most of all, I needed my faith to stay grounded and to draw strength from. That spiritual fruit is valuable stuff!
* Being a full-time mama of toddlers is harder than I ever imagined!
In that context, “full-time” truly means 24/7. Sometimes mama NEEDS a break!
* There is a calm in the storm that comes between preschool and adolescence.
Enjoy those very-short years. They won’t last long.
* Teenagers are fun! Teenagers are challenging!
Teenagers can make you laugh and cry . . . at the same time. Teenagers need mama every bit as much as preschoolers do, they just don’t think they do.
* The job of mama never ends.
My adult children will always be my children and will always need me. It just looks VERY different.
When I look back over my past almost 30-year journey of motherhood, I know now that I would do it all again. I often wish I had known then what I know now, but that wasn’t God’s plan. Instead I had to rely on faith to get me through, day by day.
Perhaps God planned it that way all along!
Stepping into the unknown of parenthood can be scary. The good news is that it is a step that is worth it in the end! If you are unsure how to face that scary phase of life, we can help. Let us take that step with you as you move into the unknown but worth-it future!
And it’s important to know that you don’t have to do this alone! Even if you don’t have close friends or family in the area, we’re here to meet that need for you, every step of the way. Check out all of these ways for you to be connected, supported and educated:
Journeys Pregnancy Education
Pathway’s Dad’s Support Class
Bridges Parenting Support Class
Feel free to come visit with us and get to know us and all we have to offer you. Before you know it, you could be like the lady in the story above . . . loving your life that you were unsure about at the beginning!
