Power of life

When the Ugly & Unplanned Ends Beautifully

This woman has willingly giving us permission to share her story so that others can realize there is hope in the midst of a difficult situation. All client experiences with Advice & Aid Pregnancy Centers are kept with the highest confidence. The stories that are shared come from the real-life experiences that our clients, staff and volunteers had during their unplanned pregnancy.

Her name has been removed but her story is true.

Pregnant and No Where to Turn
When I was 18, I found out I was pregnant. It was very unexpected and I knew my parents would be very upset. When my mom found out, she told me that I couldn’t live there with a baby and that she would not be helping me. I started going to Advice & Aid and tried to make it work with my son’s dad. I was young and scared and I felt so alone.

After a few months of being pregnant, my son’s dad got physically and verbally abusive and it just kept escalating. Not having anywhere really to go, I charged everything on credit cards and jumped from place to place. I didn’t have a job, place to live or a car. My son’s paternal grandma let me stay with her for the last few months of my pregnancy and a few months after he was born.

After my son was born, the abuse got even worse. The family on my son’s dad’s side were the only ones I had that accepted me, but they started blaming me for what was happening. I ended up leaving that situation with my son, a car seat, a stroller and a bag full of diapers because it’s all I could carry. I went to a shelter for battered women.

The team at Advice & Aid helped me find an affordable apartment. My son was sick and had two surgeries in his first year. I just kept going to their meetings every week and it helped me get through it all. I could talk to other moms and get advice and support from the ladies that worked there. Patty’s Closet was the only way I could ever get diapers, wipes and clothes for my son.

I decided I wasn’t going to accept this life and I wanted to be able to provide for my son. I had two jobs and did everything I could. Once, within two weeks of my car breaking down, I got a call from Advice & Aid asking if I knew how to drive a stick shift. Someone had donated a car! This really saved me! It got me to work so I could continue to better myself.

Making Life Changes
After I was gifted a car, I decided I wasn’t going to let this anonymous donor down. I had to make something of my life, even though everyone had told me I wouldn’t ever amount to anything because of past decisions.

Only Advice & Aid believed that I could make something of my life!

It took me about three years to really begin moving. I was so beat down from the abuse and dealing with a sick child that I felt hopeless for a long time. I decided to go back to school to get my RN, and began working on prerequisites for that. During that time, I worked two full time jobs, one part time job and cleaned houses on the side. I graduated as an RN in 2009, began working in dialysis and have been with the same company ever since. I earned my Bachelor’s degree in 2012 and became a facility administrator, where I am now the administrator of a clinic in which I have over 100 patients and directly supervise about 20 teammates. My plan is to return to school to earn my Master’s Degree in Organizational Leadership.

My son is now 16 years old and thriving. Raising him has been difficult due to his struggle with PTSD from the abuse of his dad. He also has ADHD, anxiety and is bipolar. He was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder about six years ago. He had been hospitalized eight times in psychiatric facilities before we got this diagnosis.

My son is high functioning and we have done so much to help him be able to live a “normal” life. He started working this past summer and I can’t wait to see him graduate from high school in a few years. I got married in 2011 to a great man who accepts my son as he is and acts as a father figure to him. I even gained a daughter when we married.

I really believe that I would have never made it without Advice & Aid. The support I found there from the other girls who were in my situation, the listening ears of the ladies that worked and volunteered there, and the amazing donations that made it possible for me to be able to get diapers and other items were invaluable. The fact that someone thought enough of me/others in the program to donate a car was absolutely life-changing.

This is a story of incredible strength, bravery and beauty. But the writer isn’t someone who has supernatural strength. She simply had a will to make it, the internal drive to support and love her baby . . . and the right help at the right time from those who could truly help meet her emotional and physical needs.

If you have recently found out that you are pregnant, but aren’t sure how – for whatever reason – you are going to make it, take encouragement away from this story.

Here is someone who thrived despite all of the odds against her.
You can too.
You just need the same support and help that she found.
And it’s all right here . . . waiting for you!


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