*Molly is willingly giving us permission to share her story so that others can realize there is hope in the midst of a difficult situation. All client experiences with Advice & Aid Pregnancy Centers are kept with the highest confidence. The stories that are shared come from the real-life experiences that our clients, staff and volunteers had during their unplanned pregnancy.
*Her name has been changed but her story is true.
I’ll never forget the day that I heard these words, “Molly, my dear, you’re pregnant.”
The Student Health Center Nurse kept talking, and I just couldn’t process anything else. “Do you know what you’ll do?” she asked. I kept shaking my head no. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I did not want to be pregnant. I was only 20 years old. I had plans for my life. . . getting married, finishing college, having a career. This was not in my plans. I was angry and resentful, and all I could think about was how could I get myself out of this situation. I had always considered myself to be pro-life before this moment, but now it was happening to me. Things were completely different now… I felt like I had no other choice but to have an abortion.
My boyfriend and I had been together for a few years, but yet at the moment I told him I was pregnant, I had never felt more hurt and betrayed in our relationship. How could he do this to me? My life was ruined. I asked him what we should do, and he said the choice was up to me and that he would support me in whatever I decided. I told him I wanted an abortion. I felt so alone. Even though he supported me, the weight of the decision was too much to bear by myself. I felt angry and ashamed.
I had no one to talk to about what I was going through.
I opened up and told my friend, who then suggested a local pregnancy resource center in town that she had been to previously when she had a pregnancy scare. In my heart I knew it was a better choice than calling clinics for abortion prices, but I couldn’t go to the center she suggested.
I was just too ashamed.
I couldn’t go through with it. In the meantime I was still considering abortion and trying to justify it in my mind. I made myself search online about abortion and what it involves. It was very hard emotionally, as I thought I would be better off distancing myself from the reality. I had to make it real, otherwise I knew that I wouldn’t be able to make an educated decision. It took me a long time to process everything before I could make a decision.
How could I face my parents? I felt like they would never forgive me, or that they wouldn’t love me anymore. What would people at my church think? The potential shame was too much to bear. What would my friends think? Would I be a failure for dropping out of college? Would my relationship with my boyfriend last through having a baby together?
All of those questions were very hard to process and to live out, as I ultimately chose to carry my pregnancy. I wish that I would have listened to my friend and gone to a pregnancy resource center like Advice & Aid. In my darkest hours, I needed someone to talk to, that would be supportive and listen to me without judgment. It was too much for me to handle going through it alone. I shouldn’t have ignored that feeling in my heart that I would have been cared for and listened to there.
My pride and shame got in my way.
Since those dark days, I have connected with Advice & Aid.
It has proven over and over to be a safe, caring place where I can share with women who are experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and offer them hope – the same hope that I was too afraid to receive when I was in the same situation.
If you have had an abortion – or are thinking about it – there may be emotions, pain and struggle that are hard to deal with on your own. That’s why we are here!
Every day, we talk to women in that very position. And they are finally given options, help . . . and the hope they need.
You can talk to us at any time. We are waiting for you.