Breaking up is hard to do!
Breaking up is even harder after you have been sexually intimate with your partner. There is a great deal taking place in just the brain alone during sex. Not to be too technical about it, but there are several neurochemical processes that occur during sex, which serves only to strengthen human bonds.
Remembering the good, forgetting the bad
The brain is, obviously, a huge part of sex, and is strongly stimulated during intimacy. Because of this, the act of sex is desired by the partners to be repeated. The brain produces dopamine which is a very powerful chemical, allowing you to feel very strong pleasure. When dopamine is released, it literally changes how we remember.
Another chemical released is oxytocin, which helps us to forget all we perceive to be painful. Oxytocin is primarily produced in women’s bodies, most notably during childbirth. After a woman gives birth and breastfeeds her child, she produces oxytocin, producing a strong bond with her child. Mothers will die for their child due to this strong bond, triggered by the release of oxytocin, as well as from the skin-to-skin contact with their newborn.
This same response occurs when a woman has sex with a man. Oxtocin is released, and she bonds with him emotionally. Often, this bond is so strong that when a woman is being abused by a man, she cannot bear to leave him.
But what about the men?
Men produce vasopressin, also known as the “monogamy hormone.” It has the same effect that oxytocin has on a woman. It strengthens the bond between a man and woman when they are sexually intimate.
These “bonding” chemicals narrow the selection to one person as our sexual partner. It is definitely good in a marriage relationship, but not good in a dating relationship because you are less likely to be objective when making your selection of a mate.
Save it – and here’s why!
When you have sex before marriage, you are more likely to be deeply hurt. Relationships unfortunately end, causing a great deal of pain due to what has taken place within the brain during sex. The emptiness following the end of the relationship is very painful, and you may rush into a new relationship to dull the pain. The neuro circuits do not have time to adjust, and the ability to bond with the new partner is impaired. This is especially true if a new sexual relationship begins.
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, but finding it hard to leave for any reason, contact us immediately.
We can be reached many different ways:
Schedule an Appointment online: Here
Private, Confidential Online Chat: Simply open the blue chat box at the bottom, left of this page
Content for this post taken from the article Science Proves Premarital Sex Rewires the Brain