I Can't Have This Baby - Too Many Challenges

“I Can’t Have This Baby!” When There Are Just Too Many Challenges

As a Social Worker at Advice & Aid, this is one of the most frequent reasons I hear from women who feel like they can’t have their baby. When meeting with them, I start by encouraging them to slow down and really think about their options. They don’t have to make a life-changing decision in a spur of the moment panic. They have time to think about how life might be different in a few months or a few years. 

The problems of today most often are not the problems of the next few years if they receive solid help. 

Many women, whether they are single moms, have a partner, or are married, feel like they just can’t afford one more child. They feel overwhelmed and can’t imagine how they could have the energy or finances to support one more. 

We start with where she is right now and the obstacles she is currently facing.

Does she have a child with special needs right now? Does she need proper funding and support to help that child and get respite care that gives some wiggle room and space to breathe? Does she need a better job or childcare? 

We work to make sure she gets connected with all of the programs for which she is eligible to receive medical insurance. Often, she is eligible for programs such as SNAP, WIC, and Medicaid. We help her get connected with an OB to make sure she is receiving prenatal care. Does she need counseling related to a mental health concern or past trauma? We connect her with a counselor that fits her needs and her financial situation. Does she have legal needs associated with her immigration status in the U.S. or another pending concern? We work to get her connected with a lawyer for a consultation and make a plan of action. Is domestic violence a concern?  We work on a safety plan with her and continue to assist the family through our Care Management program. 

As we help her tackle each challenge one by one, many clients begin to hope for a better life, not only for the child in her womb, but her entire family.

Here at Advice & Aid, we care deeply about the women who come through our doors. We believe that telling women that they CAN’T do something, and then encouraging them to make a decision based on that, just isn’t very empowering to women!

In fact, we believe that with the resources we can provide, and the support we can give, women actually CAN do the hard thing (especially when she finds out all that is available to her).

The main point here is . . . don’t make a decision until you know all that is available to you. You don’t have to rush. Just come talk to us. No pressure at all on our side. No judgment.

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